Festive Not Functional Christmas Card: Funny Retro Holiday Greeting for the Peppermint Schnapps Girlies

For the merrily unhinged 🍸💖 “Festive Not Functional” is the perfect holiday card for anyone running on caffeine, chaos, and peppermint schnapps. With groovy pink-red retro lettering and cheeky humor, it’s a sassy seasonal must-send.

💌 Card Specs:
• Size: 4″ × 6″ (101 × 152 mm)
• Heavyweight matte cardstock (350 gsm)
• Bright toner-based red and pink print
• Blank inside
• Includes envelope

✨ Best For:
Funny Christmas cards, retro humor, holiday cocktail lovers, festive chaos queens, adult humor cards.